When my husband and I were dating he used to say, “It’s the little things that are the big things” all the time. When he explained it to me, he referred to the Bronx Tale movie and the door test . Set in early 80’s I think, the main character was giving a young man dating advice. He instructed the young man to open the door for his date and walk behind the car to see if she leans over to unlock the door for him. If she didn’t, it was a sign of selfishness and he should go on to drop her like a bad habit (my own movie reference to the Rocky series I grew up with and love even today.) The point is that small gestures add up like quarters in a jar. John and I have been together for eight years now, and we have actively adopted the phrase to maintain the value of our marriage.
If you think about it, simple gestures are attached to beauty. So if I were giving dating advice today, I would tell our young men and ladies out there to try to look beyond the exterior. It seems logical, but again in our times of selfies and loving ourselves in a narcissistic, boastful way, it may not be as easy as it sounds. I would also encourage posts with their pics be kept to a minimal, so the interaction remains more genuine. As far as the door test goes, I would pick a test setting more durable. One that has withstood the test of time… the kitchen. I may have thrown you for a loop, but don’t worry, when you know you are being valued, other doors are bound to open. You know the old question, “Do you live to eat, or eat to live?” Well if you follow my blog, you know that I’m on a weight loss journey, but the only reason I’m on that darn path in the first place is that I live to eat. To me the kitchen is the sexiest place where testing the little things has an array of possibilities.
Everyone remembers the first time their spouse cooked for them. That’s like a huge romantic gesture! After eight years it continues to be a huge romantic gesture for me. Honestly whether my husband washes the dishes, or cooks for me, those small gestures, signal my inner self that I am loved. By that same thought, I like to think that bringing him coffee each morning as he wakes up, or go by the office with lunch lets him know I dig him. These are tiny, tiny gestures, with colossal impact. And for young couples raising a baby, the sexiest room in the house may be the one that has a changing table in it. I think offering to help is the sexiest thing a man can do for his wife. “Honey why don’t you have a glass of wine in the next room or take an extra long bath, I’VE GOT THIS.” Again very sexy. If more couples experienced those tiny moments, we would have less divorce, I guarantee it! As a matter of fact all those small gestures, the ones that say we are partners and I love you, were missing from my first marriage and indeed it ended up in divorce.
The little things are the big things! What a great idea to live by and such an easy way to enhance one’s beauty and attractiveness. Tiny actions- no strings attached- like insider trading. Your stock will definitely go up!
Post Note– Day 157 of my weight loss journey 148.0 ( Got off track last weekend, but back on track now)
A little on edge with Thanksgiving this coming week. I plan to give myself that day, then hopefully make healthy turkey leftovers. Any healthy recipes much appreciated.